Prank? To me, it’s more about hate
Why do we hate each other?
What is it that causes some of us to be mean to others, usually when we can sneak around in the dark and keep our identity hidden?
Charles Ray and his wife and their Bothell neighborhood are the latest victims. Someone recently spray-painted a racial slur on his property, along with a recommendation that he and his wife move somewhere else, anywhere but the home they’ve lived in the past 30 years.
It would be easy to assume it’s the work of juveniles who know little of the history or the effects of hatred, much less have experienced it. Sure, probably just a prank. Yeah, kids will be kids.
That’s what Ray believes.
“I really don’t think they have the hate per se that we want to attach to it,” he said. “I don’t think they really deep down in their heart mean what it [the slur and swastika] means.”
Ray is more easygoing, more understanding, than I am.
A prank might be wrapping someone’s property in toilet paper, not in racial slurs. Regardless of who does things like this, and why, they aren’t pranks.
And the trend is even more disturbing.
In the past few months, there have been three instances in Mill Creek where someone has painted swastikas on homes or cars. In Arlington, a home was painted with a swastika and racial slur, recalling a crime a few years ago when a black minister’s home there was the site of a cross-burning.
“They don’t know what this means to an African-American or someone who’s Jewish,” said Ray, who is African American.
Why do we do this to each other? Is it hatred, fear, ignorance, peer pressure, a need for attention? All of them?
Ray calls it a fad.
“I do not think it’s a hate crime,” he emphasized. “No way. Nobody has any reason to hate me.
“I’d bet my last 10 bucks it was a bunch of kids I’ve seen. When I first saw it, I said, ‘They finally got to me.’ ”
What’s wrong with “getting to someone” by treating them with respect and decency, along with a little common courtesy - which most of us would admit we’re better at preaching than practicing?
No, most of us aren’t perfect, but we also aren’t haters, or insensitive pranksters, or so desperate for attention we’re willing to make others feel bad.
I know I’m preaching here, and I’m preaching to the choir, because the chances of a hateful slurmonger reading this are pretty slim. But there are times when you feel strongly about something and you need to let folks know that, hey, this matters.
The Snohomish County Sheriff’s Office is investigating the crime at Ray’s home as malicious harassment. Harassment? An incident like this strikes me as more than harassment. It doesn’t matter if it’s racial, religious or based on sexual orientation or political views, someone’s civil rights have been violated.
It might help if haters could be sentenced to be victims of hate crimes to understand what it feels like, or to walk in their victims’ shoes for a while. Or be sentenced to at least get to know their victims.
“Don’t mess up the kids with punishment,” Ray said. “Ten years from now, they’re not going to be the same people.
“But you do have to pay up” in some way, he agreed.
I’ve only spent a few minutes with Charles Ray, and that was on the phone, but I can’t imagine that anyone would hate him. He sounded a lot like the 73-year-old great-grandfather he is, someone who has done a lot of living, learned a lot about life and has a nice way of looking at the world.
Hate him? We could all learn a lot from people like him.
Scott Barry: 425-745-7816 or sbarry@seattletimes.com